Dr. Eboni Green
December 22, 2023
As your parents age, you’ll likely play a vital role in their care and support. However, it’s important to remember that there can be a right and wrong way to go about helping your elderly parents. All too often, adult children end up believing that just helping at all is enough, but that’s not the case — managed incorrectly, elderly parents can end up feeling that their adult child is trying to take over their life. It’s always important that your parents retain as much autonomy and independence as possible.
The following are five tips that you can implement to assist you as you support your parents:
You can’t work on providing the right type of care if you don’t know what your parents need. Step one is always taking the time to discuss their needs through with your parents, and just generally have a frank and honest conversation. It’s much easier to manage physical and mental health issues when they’re manageable, rather than waiting until they’ve grown to be large issues. Once you understand your parents’ unmet needs, you can come up with a plan that ensures they get the appropriate services.
There’s a lot of help and support available, but keep in mind that not all support options are created equally, and therefore not every service will meet your parents’ needs. The next step in the process is to search for carers that’ll help. Care.com reviews typically mention the range of options available on the website, so that could be a good place to begin your search. Once you have the right people in place, you’ll feel confident that your parents are moving in the right direction.
It’s important to remember that you’re not in charge of your parents; they’re in charge of themselves. While you’ll be taking on additional responsibilities, and in all likelihood your relationship will change, it’s still key to encourage your parents to maintain their independence. Keep in mind that the goal of supporting your parents is to let them live their best life, not to make your life easier. As always, they should be the ones in charge, so allow them to control how and when you help them.
It can be emotionally and physically tiring to care for your parents. As such, it’s important that you look after yourself. Caregiver burnout can strike anyone, so it’s essential to take proactive steps to prevent it from happening. Make sure you get help from others, invest in relaxation activities, and be aware of when you may be beginning to feel the stress of providing care.
Finally, remember that putting together a care plan for your parents isn’t a one-time thing. It’s something that you should periodically review and update. If something isn’t working, then change it. Keeping ongoing conversations with your parents is key.
